Hi there, this is Cindy. I have never blogged before. I think I have a subconscious aversion to "blogging" because I hate the way the word "blog" sounds. I think whoever decided to name inspiring editorials & opinion pieces "blogs," should have been sentenced to mud wrestle for 30 minutes. Or thrown into quicksand. Actually, "blogging" sounds like a combination of the two - wrestling around in a slop of mud & quicksand. It rhymes with "slogging," which is exactly what I have been doing with this idea of blogging. Why couldn't THEY (who exactly are they?) have named this category of honest, inspirational writing something beautiful? Like....like....you know....well I can't think of anything off the top of my head. But alas, as my dear children tell me when I ramble like this, "Mom, they don't care."

Ok so now that I've gotten that off my chest, shall we venture into the inspirational content of this message? The reason Garrett & I named this blog....yuk.... Whole Life Renovation, is simply because we see that both of our lives are being completely renovated: Our relationship status (we've been casual church friends for 20 years, married to other people, & now we are husband & wife - - Cindy: "I really married the sound guy??" Garrett: "I really married the children's choir director??"), family (his three, my three, spouses, in-laws, & 4 grandchildren all one family now), our bodies (getting older so you have to address embarrassing issues & then buy a zillion vitamin supplements), our living location (Garrett lived in Nashville, I lived in Spring Hill, now we reside in booming - moo, baa, chirp chirp - Columbia TN in the country), careers (he left his job of 18 years to pursue something different, & I finally have lots of time to write music again), our emotional lives (getting used to feeling like a couple, letting go of the past), our spiritual lives ( thrilled that we both have the same priorities - hearts for God, family, & people), & last but not least OUR 1977 4500-SQ-FT HOUSE ON 6 ACRES. I would say that's a "whole life renovation," wouldn't you?

From my point of view, my biggest challenges are in my own head. I moved to Nashville from Atlanta in 1984, excited to pursue the music business, & for two years had a ball performing, traveling & teaching. But from the time I married my first husband in 1986 until I married Garrett in 2015 my life here has been slammed with one heartbreaking challenge after another. Ever been to the wave pool? The water may be calm for a few minutes, but don't let your guard down because the waves are going to start back up and you'll get hit again & again & again. I had to be the strong organized one in my first marriage; my wonderful mother passed away during that time so I was also strong for my grieving father; after 8 1/2 miserable years I left & for 4 years was a single mother of my three little ones with no help, so I got stronger; after 4 years I married someone I deeply loved but who could never move beyond his dysfunctional past so again, the strong one; I was strong for my brother who struggled with drug addiction for years; strong for my children who suffered from bad fathering on all sides; strong for my friends; strong when my dear sweet father's health declined & he passed away; strong to single-handedly go through every thing in the house of my childhood, organize an estate sale (from Nashville), & sell my beloved Atlanta home; strong when my second husband left us.....During those final years of my second marriage God could see that I was emotionally shutting down & systematically locking my softer romantic side into a closet because my demanding life allowed no place to express it.

I had great girlfriends, but then God surprised me, bringing two strong men into my life at the same time, who became "husbands" to me of sorts, for five years. I was asked to be worship leader at an African church, & Pastor Blaise Katshing, a vibrant, fearless man from the Republic of Congo prayed over me many times as my pastor & loved me as my spiritual leader, healing the damage caused by my husbands. I was also introduced to the beautiful world of ballroom dance, where God gave me a wonderful dance instructor & friend, Carl Madanchi, who taught me much more than dance steps. On the dance floor, my soul & body were free to be beautiful & sensual. As the situation at home was becoming more negative & hopeless, I was coming back to life more & more each day! It was such a relief to have two strong men in my life I could lean on. I can never thank them enough for the love they showered on me during that painful transition.

Then along comes Garrett Hestla........stay tuned!